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I don’t feel so good
Is it me or is it hot in here?
I fell asleep in my pudding
I think I’ve had too much wine.


This guy asked me out for dinner
He seemed so cool at the bar
His hands are warm and sweaty
He’s putting me into his car


I woke up in my own bed
Wearing nothing but socks
A burning pain round my anus
The faint smell of cock

I can’t believe this has happened to me
It’s a dream sent from above
It’s everything I wanted
It’s everything I needed
To be taking advantage of
Hey hey hey

On the floor by the cupboard
The guy is slumped and blue
I could never have guessed that
He liked Rohypnol too



from Late Night Electric Watermelon, released February 23, 2014


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Phil Nichol London, UK

a young simpleton.

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